Anyway, you also know you're in your 30's when you make fun of the 50-year-old plastics in your weights class because they look, for the life of you, exactly like Malibu Barbie, but meaner. (Even down to the makeup tatts). Unfortunately, you also know you're in your 30's when the mockery doesn't last too long because mid-aged Barbie can lift triple what you can and never break a sweat or show any signs of wayward jigglage.
Maybe Barbie was once the 30-year-old brunette best friend of Barbie. (We'll call the best friend Stacy, for reference). Maybe Stacy wasn't happy being Stacy anymore, after she realized Barbie was having more fun. Stacy wanted the glory. She wanted the platinum halo and arched eyebrows framing her determined gaze. So, I'm telling myself that what I saw today in my class wasn't Barbie. It was a Stacy in Barbie's clothing......
For now, this 31-year old Stacy is both wondering and worrying that she might mistakenly become Killer Barbie. Will continuing to go to these classes slowly wear me down until I am one? I don't know. Maybe it will just turn me into a really nice Skipper? Short of dropping a few thousand clams for some gelatinous inserts, Skipper is all I can hope for....... Well, more like Raisin Skipper, unless I drop a few more greenbacks for Botox or Restalin.
I am scared that I just contemplated the above thoughts.
Hey.....here's a thought: Maybe I shouldn't have joined that gym. :) It's like living inside a beauty magazine and a tabloid at the same time. This is why I run outside. I can enjoy nature. I don't think there's any nature at Gold's!
You're cracking me up. What are you going to do when you turn 40? You'll still look like you're 25 and people will think I'm your mum, I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteAw, come on, there was only one barbie and we can all let that slide right? And it's just not as fun if I have to work out alone.
ReplyDeleteOh, alright. But I blame you for the ouch factor of my Friday. Seriously can't move.
ReplyDeleteI miss those trips together to Gold's. I agree I love to be outside and not cooped up in the gym.
ReplyDeleteYou don't look a day over 20. I will definitely use "hard-body" in a conversation today!!
ReplyDeleteI hate barbie! Skipper I can relate to due to the lack of a "chest" but other than that...
ReplyDeleteYou are so dang funny Shelly! I just love reading your thoughts!!! And seriously, "hard body"????.... Ok Miss Petite.... give the rest of us a CHANCE!!! I do, however, agree with you on the Unnatural atmosphere of Golds.... outside is SO much better!
The problem is that your going to Gold's. If you were to go to the legacy center with me you would probably feel great about yourself. Most the people who go there are in their 80's and it takes them 20 minutes to get in one lap around the track.
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, you look awesome. Really.
Ah Shell, you are pretty much the epitome of hilarity. I could read the most boring thing you've ever written and probably still be laughing. Let's make it a family goal to write more. We should all write a book.
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